The 10 Must-Have Features in Today’s New Homes–Yahoo headline; provided by Market Watch, 2/1/2010

February 8th, 2010

by Steve Kerch

The kitchen is still king.

LAS VEGAS — Americans want smaller houses and they are willing to strip some of yesterday’s most popular rooms — such as home theaters — from them in order to accommodate changing lifestyles, consumer experts told audiences at the International Builders Show here this week.

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Paul Cardis, CEO of AVID Ratings Co., which conducts an annual survey of home-buyer preferences, said there are 10 “must” features in new homes.

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The list is real, but I saw something quite different.

1. Large Kitchens, With an Island

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The Adirondack is a beautiful kitchen.

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Hawaii Dream is one of the  favorites of Left Coasters.

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Naked In Paradise is gathering a loyal following.

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2. Energy-Efficient Appliances, High-Efficiency Insulation and
High Window Efficiency
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A Cleveland, Ohio entrepreneur, Silesius Horvak, commissioned Allis-Chalmers to construct one of the world’s largest steam engines as the power source for the Steam-O-Dent Oral De-Tartarizator. Before placing the 87-ton behemoth in front of consumers, a year of rigorous testing proved that the idea was based in logic, but the inability to master the control values while brushing resulted in more than six tons of bone and gum loss by those paid to participate in the trials.
The above appeared earlier in this blog. The machine not only was perfected, it can now run up to four household appliances…
AT THE SAME TIME!!!
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The concept of energy efficient insulation is not wasted on the Cartstairs’ family. Dirt, grass and concrete blocks form the basis of an environmentally green home. Still–and this will be mentioned below by ceiling fans everywhere, Mr, Carstairs should have put a protective covering over Mrs. Carstairs and little Debbie.
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The Nelson family lives comfortably in a green,
controlled environment outside of Fargo, North Dakota.
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These two examples of perfectly energy efficient windows (above & below) demonstrate the power and vitality of the city.
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3. Home Office/Study

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I can wax nostalgic on the simplicity of design for this main floor office. New home owners demand the ability to plug-in, log-on & drop trou. The busy contemporary family needs the space to work at home and there are any number of distinctive plans to lead the way.

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4. Main-Floor Master Suite
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The hectic pace of today’s world, in which movers and shakers rule, demands that rest and relaxation is a full-bore necessity. There are times when the leaders only want to follow and that’s why BDSM chambers are selling like hot grates.
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Some people hire in professionals who treat the discipline
as all in a day’s work.

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Other consumers prefer to employ a master to truly loves

his or her work and would gladly do it for stock options.

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5. Outdoor Living Room

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6. Ceiling Fans

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7. Master Suite Soaker Tubs

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These amenities represent the cutting edge of self-mutilation, but users agree that their skin is all the better for its communion with industrial pickling agents.

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8. Stone and Brick Exteriors

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The above examples amply explain the future of housing materials as smaller size is a true gauge of Americans’ feelings for McMansions.

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Also left in the wake of the use of brick and stone are the millions of units produced from twigs or straw.

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9. Community Landscaping, With Walking Paths and Playgrounds

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Moline, Illinois is the home to the exclusive Morrisania Vintage Condominium which features a four acre common area suitable for most outdoor activities.

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10. Two-Car Garages

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Carbon Footprint?  Indeed!

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Images: (Citations, of which there are many, are coming.)


To Ease Budget Woes, California Might Sell Ads on Electronic Freeway Signs–Sacramento Bee headline, 2/5/2010

February 7th, 2010
Vincenzo Kolchak sent the story and his idea for dancing electrons…
Speed Limit70Cruise better with

SHELL Gasoline

With Platformate

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I wondered, “Why stop with electronic freeway signs?”
 
On a two-lane blacktop somewhere near Modesto…
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The article is here.
Image: (sign) upload.wikimedia.org via commons.wikimedia.org;  (Sears) acgadmin.fry.com via autoclubgroup.com

Will We Ever Again Trust Wall Street?–headline, 2/6/2010

February 6th, 2010

For a second, I wondered if this were a “When did you stop beating your wife?” question.  Then I noticed it was on

THE WALL STREET JOURNAL site.

“About 600 people, some from as far as Hawaii, sat through sessions on how to expand the movement.” — Kate Zernike in the New York Times, 2/6/2009

February 6th, 2010
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600
                        ____________  =  .000001944
 
308, 630, 470
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Yet, the media treat this as if it were a mainstream event.

Chris Wallace Takes What He can Get.

February 5th, 2010

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The story is here.
Image: (Palin) via grizzlybay.org; (Wallace) foxnews via newsbusters.com

‘Isolation is No Longer an Option for Switzerland’–Der Spiegel headline

February 2nd, 2010
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dpa
German Finance Minister Wolfgang Schauble registers his opinion of
the Gnomes of Zurich as Chancellor Angela Merkel flinches. “Still,”
she said resignedly, “It’s better than a cowboy neck rub.”
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Massachusetts voters should be very proud.

February 1st, 2010
Politician would like to see daughter get another shot on ‘Idol’

WASHINGTON — Sen.-elect Scott Brown says he’d like daughter Ayla to have another crack at “American Idol,” where judge Simon Cowell once described her performance as robotic and empty.

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I almost forgot. They have a CD to hawk.
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020110scottbrownpicture.jpg Cosmopolitan via eagleonline.com

Warning Signs That He’s Not Over His Ex

February 1st, 2010

by StyleCaster, on Thu Jan 21, 2010 3:01pm PST

If he…

1. Constantly brings her up in conversation

2. Compares her to you

3. Continues to hang out with her

4. Routinely calls her

5. Accidentally calls you by her name…

6. Holds onto memorabilia from his past relationship

7. Listens to morbid breakup music…

8. Brings you to places that remind him of her…

9. He’s annoyed that she’s dating someone…

10. He keeps pictures of her…

Warning signs?! These are prima facie evidence that he could care less about you. The only more obvious ’sign’ would be his banning you from the bedroom so he could sleep with her in private.

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John Edwards’ Ex-Aide Andrew Young Speaks On Alleged Rielle Hunter Sex Tape - And Fears For His Life–New York Daily News headline, February 1, 2010

February 1st, 2010
What life?
 
He agrees to say he is the father of his boss’ love child, picks through the mistress’ trash, then makes appearances talking about it.
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The article is here.
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Images: (Fool’s Cap) via utheguru.com

Hello, Sergeant Preston & Yukon King!

January 26th, 2010
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Image: (Sergeant Preston) cf

Remember this guy?

January 26th, 2010
‘Bulletproof’ bat mitzvah big shot in ’scam’ trial
The New York Post
By SELIM ALGAR

Last Updated: 12:56 PM, January 26, 2010

Posted: 3:04 AM, January 26, 2010

Even body armor might not help him now.

The Long Island bulletproof-vest mogul who shelled out $10 million for his daughter’s star-studded bat mitzvah financed the fete and other wild luxuries by looting his own company and duping shareholders, federal prosecutors said yesterday.

Former DHB Industries CEO David Brooks made headlines in 2005 with the lavish Rainbow Room bash, for which he paid millions to have his daughter serenaded by such star acts as 50 Cent, Tom Petty and Aerosmith.

The former Old Westbury resident is now being tried along with his company’s former COO, Sandra Hatfield, and faces up to life in prison if convicted on charges that include insider trading and securities fraud.

Imagine what it would have cost if he had hired Menudo?

DADDY’S $10M ‘BAD’ MITZVAH

By SELIM ALGAR and ANDY GELLER

New York Post

October 26, 2007 — The former CEO of the leading supplier of body armor to U.S. soldiers in Iraq was charged yesterday with looting the company to bankroll a lavish lifestyle that included a $10 million bat mitzvah for his daughter.

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New York Post

In addition to the bat mitzvah - which included performances by Aerosmith, 50 Cent, Tom Petty, Kenny G and the Eagles - prosecutors said David Brooks got the firm, DHB Industries, to pay for other goodies.

Among them were a face lift for his ex-wife; vitamins for his stable of 100 horses; pricey vacations; fancy jewels; an armored car; a $194,000 Bentley; and a $100,000 diamond-studded belt buckle.

The elaborate scheme exploded yesterday when federal prosecutors unsealed a 21-count indictment accusing Brooks, 53, of securities fraud, insider trading, tax evasion and obstruction of justice. If convicted, he could spend the rest of his life behind bars.

Sandra Hatfield, 54, the company’s former chief operating officer, was hit with similar charges.

Brooks founded DHB, which moved from Westbury, L.I., to Pompano Beach, Fla., last year, and served as its chairman and chief executive officer. He resigned last year as the scandal erupted.

He allegedly reaped $185 million by selling DHB stock when he learned that 6,000 bullet-proof vests the company made were about to be recalled for being faulty and not able to block bullets.

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I did a story on this subject in January, 2007

Arrowsmith, 50 Cent, Chain Mail

New York Times

November 18, 2005

National Briefing | Washington: Washington: Military Body Armor Recalled

“The Army and Marine Corps said they had ordered the recall of 18,000 torso-protecting vests, some used by American troops in Iraq, after determining that the body armor failed to meet ballistic specifications. Military officials insisted that troops had never been put at risk. The vests, designed to prevent or minimize torso wounds, were made by Point Blank Body Armor Inc. of Pompano Beach, Fla., military officials said. Officials with Point Blank’s parent company, DHB Industries Inc., did not immediately return calls seeking comment.”

On January 2, 2006 The New York Times‘ lead editorial was entitled Another Marie Antoinette Momment. The International Herald Tribune reprinted it.

Throughout January, The New York Times has run more stories on this important issue. (In case
90% of the cable news producers are reading this. I wanted to let you know that many stories
rate follow-up pieces–not just unfortunate, missing person cases, the break-up of Hollywood marriages and the use of the Dr. Brazelton approach for rearing Pandas.)

Meanwhile, I went to the DHB Industries where a flashing link connected me to their online store which featured t-shirts, baseball caps, knee braces and the like. I would have thought that a body armor business would sell more exotic products through its online store.

Therefore, I make the following suggestions for new products next year.

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Thanks to Gungfu.com. Goldfinger, The Prisoner.

This entry was posted on Saturday, October 27th, 2007 at 7:06 pm and is filed under Business, Afghanistan, Iraq, Pentagon, Wealth, Weapons, Sleaze.


Vincenzo is the person who found irony in the “Twenty One” quiz show scandal. Everyone was worried about keeping the high ground for a program sponsored by GERITOL tonic for “tired blood.”

January 26th, 2010

 I sent the following item from GADGET LAB

to Vincenzo Kolchak:


Blu-ray Maker Re-Boxes $500 Player, Charges $3,500

* By Charlie Sorrel Email Author
* January 22, 2010
* 7:14 am
* Categories: Media Players

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“Above you see two Blu-ray players. On the bottom is the Oppo BDP-83, a $500 machine. On top is the Lexicon BD-30, which will set you back $3,500. Can you spot the difference, apart from the price?

“It’s a trick question. There is no difference, at least not on the inside. In a daring matryoshka-like move, it appears that Lexicon simply bought a batch of Oppos and put them in new cases. Lest you think we are being picky here, or that Lexicon somehow took the guts of the Oppo and redesigned the surrounding circuitry, let us clarify. If you open up the $3,500 Lexicon, you will find an entire Oppo Blu-ray player inside, intact, with its original chassis.”

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It must have struck a nerve. His response:

This is not uncommon — in the obsessive-compulsive universe of high end audio, price is more often than not the determining factor in a system’s ‘quality’ — that makes selling to such souls something like shooting fish in a barrel.  It’s amusing to look at the cost of high end cabling — audio, power and speaker ‘cords’ that sell for the nearly the same prices by the foot as Tiffany gold necklaces.  People, mostly all men, fork over the change for these ‘wires’ with great enthusiasm — and of course, they claim that they can ‘hear’ the difference between these astonishingly overpriced cables and just ordinary professional grade cabling.  Since most of these men are middle aged, I really wonder if they have ever ‘heard’ of the conductive hearing loss that’s a natural part of aging.

I remember a cartoon by the darkly comic Rodriguez (himself an audio fan) of an audio store with older adults looking in the window bearing a sign that said something like:  “Seniors, Why Pay for Frequency Response You Can’t Hear — Trade Down your Speakers and Save!”

It happens in cars too.  BMW has always been candid about the differential in the costs in a family of similar engines was often more a matter of its relatively cheap engine control chipset, rather than the more expensive mechanical ‘differences’ between them.  In the world of German cars, the price differentials are quite astonishing, although some of the audio systems around now cost enough to buy most of their owners a very nice German sedan.  Ironically, the price of these fine sedans usually includes first-rate audio systems.  Hmmmm . . . and you can use them to drive to audiophile stores too.

What baseball player said that cocaine habits were God’s way of telling you you made too much money — that bon mot could easily describe the world of high end audio.  I would have thought that, in the degraded audio world of the iPod, earbuds and MP3, the market for high end audio has softened — but I doubt it — I think for fussy men of a certain age, it’s the closest thing they have to a quest for the Holy Grail or the Golden Fleece (appropriately named I think).  Jason and the Argonauts depart on a journey to find the Platinum Crossover.  I wonder if the Oracle spoke in stereo.

Sorry for the little rant — in the world of mavenhood, it’s always ‘opinion before fact.’  But, it’s always nice to know how close we still are to the medicine shows of the 19th century.

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A Movie Tagline Test. Identify the Film from the corresponding Tagline.

January 25th, 2010

Four Points for Each Correct Answer

Each tagline is from IMDb.com.  Emphasis is studio’s.

1-An offer you can’t refuse.

2-A Tale of the Christ

3-His Triumph Changed The World Forever.

4-It’s a race for the secret … or TOTAL DESTRUCTION

5-The GREATEST ROMANCE and ADVENTURE in a THOUSAND YEARS!

6-Gable and Lancaster make the seas boil in the battle adventure that hits like a torpedo!

7-A cop who enforces his own brand of justice.

8-The dancing’s over. Now it gets dirty.

9-The rules of the road are simple. Don’t turn back.

10-As big as the ocean!

11-The motion picture with something to offend everyone!

12-A new- and altogether different- screen excitement!!!

13-What one loves about life are the things that fade

14-The type of man she hated . . . was the type she wanted !

15-You don’t stay at the top forever

16-Capture the spirit of Christmas with this timeless classic!

17-Alfred Hitchcock takes you…. North by Northwest!

18-…all it takes is a little Confidence.

19-A Hollywood Story

20-It’s Love And Murder At First Sight !

21-The land had changed. They hadn’t. The earth had cooled. They couldn’t.

22-It’s thrilling . . . it’s chilling . . . it’s the most baffling mystery story in years !

23-Adventure at its boldest! Bogart at his best!

24-The Man Lived by the Jungle Law of the Docks!

25-the hot-line suspense comedy

Bonus Questions
(4 pts. each)

A–The Amazing New Warner Bros. Sensation!

B–The most magnificent picture ever!

C–Mighty Spectacle

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How will they determine the difference?

January 25th, 2010

Movie made by chimpanzees to be broadcast on television

By Matt Walker, Editor, Earth News

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There were far worse movies than THE OSCAR, but those films did not require an all-star cast to be horrible. I suggest you rent this epic because it will keep you in stitches.  Certain bad movies transcend their mediocrity to rise to a level which has a salutary effect on the viewer. In these pages, I have mentioned STONE COLD, ROADHOUSE and BLACK DOG as perennial favorites despite their otherwise shaky footing. While these latter movies had none of the legion of stars with both feature length roles or simple cameos, they provided great entertainment.
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IMDb.com listed the following as the tagline for THE OSCAR:

“This is the story of…The Dreamers and The Schemers…The Hustlers and The Hopefuls…The Free-loaders and The Phonies…The Fakers and The Famous…All Fighting for the Highest Possible Award!!”
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Images: (movie poster) IMDb.com via ziegfeldgirl1941 via acephoto.org; (photo) sunshinelookalikes.com; {chimp director} jrensey.blog.files.wordpress.com via sarahaskew.wordpress.com ; {camera chimp} sdloarnavigator.net; {director’s right hand) taronga.iorg.au via photo of Fifi by Rick Stevens; {Chimp w/ .45 on car} armscontrolwonk.com

SC Lt. Gov. compares people getting gov’t help to ‘stray animals’ who ‘breed’ because they don’t know better. –THINK PROGRESS headline

January 24th, 2010

By Amanda Terkel on Jan 23rd, 2010 at 3:02 pm
South Carolina Lt. Gov. Andre Bauer, who is running for the Republican nomination for governor, held a town hall meeting yesterday where he argued government should be tougher on families whose children receive free and reduced-price lunches.

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The Lieutenant Governor in what could be an

unguarded moment of reflection on his Christianity.

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Photograph via ThinkProgress.com

Rest In Peace

January 23rd, 2010

Silver screen legend Jean Simmons dies at 80

THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

Saturday, January 23rd 2010, 11:41 AM

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Baron/Getty

Jean Simmons - shown in 1954 - starred in movies such as ‘Affair with a Stranger’ and ‘The Actress’ in her early career.

LOS ANGELES - Jean Simmons, the film star who played Ophelia to Laurence Olivier’s Hamlet, sang with Marlon Brando in “Guys and Dolls” and co-starred with Gregory Peck, Paul Newman and Kirk Douglas, has died. She was 80.